The Album That Made Me Miss Glam Metal on Purpose
276 days till W:O:A 2023.
And the genre masochism has officially begun.
Time to dive into my alphabetical band crawl, starting with the U.S. metalcore outfit Beartooth. Or as I like to call them: the musical equivalent of a pre-workout energy drink that also wants to talk about its feelings.
Critics Adore Him. I Remain Unconvinced.
Beartooth was formed in 2012 by Caleb Shomo, who—brace yourself—writes everything, sings everything, and, for the first few albums, played everything. Yes, we’re dealing with One Of Those. The tortured genius type who turns inner turmoil into breakdowns and melodic hooks. You can already tell this is going to be a genre I struggle with.
So far, they’ve released four studio albums, all of which have been warmly received by critics. Their latest, Below (2021), apparently pivots slightly from their metalcore roots into more hard rock/heavy metal territory. That’s adorable. I’m filing them under metalcore anyway, because we’re here to suffer, and I refuse to split genre hairs when I’m already split emotionally from listening to this.
A Brief Lesson in Emotional Whiplash
Quick crash course for the unfamiliar: metalcore = extreme metal + hardcore punk, with bonus emotional instability. Expect breakdowns, chuggy riffs, start-stop rhythm guitar, screamed verses, and choruses so clean and catchy they sound like they escaped from a completely different band.
Speaking of choruses—Below is absolutely infested with them. I’ve listened to the album twice, and the chorus from The Past Is Dead has been haunting me like a particularly stubborn poltergeist.
"Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh!"
Yes. That’s the actual lyric. No, I’m not okay.
The album is weirdly easy to listen to. It’s fast, upbeat, and has all the ingredients of “extreme metal,” but—It’s oddly digestible, like someone ran blastbeats through a Brita filter.
Clean Choruses and Other Betrayals
I can appreciate the punchy riffs and screamed vocals. I can even get behind the occasional blastbeat. But the moment that stadium-sized singalong chorus kicks in One minute I’m being screamed at, the next I’m trapped in a power ballad with commitment issues.
Take Devastation as a prime example—it starts brutal. You think, 'Okay, yes, give me carnage.' And then—the chorus happens.
“There is something in the water—
Yes. It’s called cognitive dissonance.
This is probably what makes metalcore so appealing to so many people. That whiplash between aggression and accessibility. The tortured screaming followed by an anthem you could hear at a high school football game. It’s built for maximum crowd participation and minimum emotional coherence.
I'll Take My Melodrama With Spandex, Thanks
Look, I gave it a shot. Twice. But if I’m going to be emotionally manipulated by soaring choruses and melodic heartbreak, I’d rather do it with eyeliner and spandex, thank you very much. Glam metal at least knows it’s ridiculous.
So no, metalcore isn’t my scene. But that’s what Genre Tourism is for: visiting, politely nodding, and then sprinting back to your musical homeland before someone hands you another breakdown.